Yeah, ring shopping is one of the most intimidating things I’ve ever done. Your wife is going to wear this thing as the symbol of your commitment and love for each other for the rest of her life. So you want to get it right.
Ashley was really helpful in this. She put together a photo set of rings she liked so I could get an idea of her taste.
Based on this, I knew she wanted white gold or silver, a simple design and something vaguely floral. I ended up choosing my favorite from the photo set and doing a reverse-image search on google to track it down.
The ring I got her was was the “Willow” setting from Brilliant Earth:
Brilliant Earth is a great company by the way. Their rings are conflict free and “ethical origin”, and they have great prices, selection and customer service.
If you can, have your girlfriend go to a jewelry store and get her ring size measured. Most Jewelers you buy from will resize for free, but it’s better to get it right the first time if you can.
I did some research before shopping and learned that there are certain things to look for in buying a diamond: The Four C’s.
- Cut - The better a diamond is cut, the more light will reflect back out of it. This is the “sparkle factor” of the diamond.
- Clarity - Diamonds are rocks, and they will have specks, spots and impurities in them. The fewer the spots, the greater the clarity. (Although some people want a small, distinct spot somewhere in the diamond so they can identify it if it’s stolen.)
- Color - The lower the quality of a diamond, the more it will have a yellow tint to it. The higher the quality, the clearer it will seem.
- Carat - This is the size of the diamond. Bigger diamonds cost more, but some girls want a more modest diamond size.
The Four C’s of the diamond you buy will depend a lot on what you’re willing to spend for it. I did my best to balance all these aspects and still ended up spending a LOT more than I had planned. (But if there’s ever a time to splurge on the cost of something, this is it.)
The diamond I got Ashley looks great and was even mined in Canada’s Northwest Territory - So Ashley always has a little piece of home with her. (She’s Canadian.) ;)
Anymore, the way you give the ring to your fiancee is as important as the ring itself. So do your best to know what kind of proposal your girl is hoping for.
- Does she want to be surprised? Some girls want a build-up to the moment. Others don’t want to see it coming.
- Does she want it planned? Some girls want to be surrounded by candles and flowers when their guy drops to one knee. Others will love it if he pulls over in the middle of a rainstorm and kneels in the middle of the street.
- Does she want it public? Some girls want the attention of a crowd for their big moment. Other’s want the intimacy of a private moment.
- Does she want it documented? Some girls don’t care about this so much. But our generation generally expects to see a video or photos of the proposal afterward. So it’s probably smart to give your fiancee something to brag with later.
I knew that Ashley wanted to be surprised by a private, outdoor proposal and I knew she wanted photos. So I picked a mountaintop and my friend Dan and I went to check it out. He’s a photographer and was able to find a great spot where the city lights were visible.
On Ashley’s first night in Colorado, I took her hiking up the mountain, telling her we would just go to watch the sun set. But when Dan showed up “accidentally” with a camera, I dropped to one knee and asked her to marry me. (SHE SAID YES!)
So, yeah, there’s a lot to consider. But hopefully I’ve given you a good starting place.
I hope she says yes, Anon!
Peace, love and Jesus,
If you’re a girl and reading this, help your future husband out. He wants to give you what you want, but guys can’t read minds. So let him know your tastes, your ring size and your proposal expectations. Spelling it out for him might seem unromantic. But it’ll be worth it when he actually puts it all together and proposes.